The Magic of Creating Charming Friendships
The WSJ ran an article arguing “It’s hard to make friends as an adult.” Social wealth is important, so they wrote tips on how to make friends.
Many would agree that making friends as adults can feel hard, boring, time consuming, and just downright exhausting.
But it doesn’t have to be this way.
I was recently sought out by a major newspaper to speak on this very topic.
They were writing a story on making friends in adulthood and asked me to contribute.
As a socialite, I of course said yes! Not the entire interview, but a snippet of how to - like magic - create charming friendships.
(Yes, this framework is like making offers in business)
Meet new people. Don’t surround yourself with the same people.
I’m able to make new friends because I meet a lot of different people. I also am sure to attend elevated events so that I’m surrounded by women with audacious goals. In recent years I’ve met friends at luxury retreats, A-list events, and women’s wealth groups. This can be online or in-person. I have a global social circle of high-vibe women.
Give value. When you meet new people, be sure to give value.
Giving value means listening to them. Connect with them and help them feel heard. Ask relevant questions and share too. I notice women in my community are unsure of how to ask engaging questions. One reason for this is because when visiting social media groups, visitors are told not to “poll.” So the community interaction is very one way. So when we meet others in person or in having a live conversation, they are not used to asking high quality questions. They don’t realize they are doing this.
When women join my program to learn to meet new people (friends, dating, business, otherwise) I notice they need support on is learning how to ask high quality questions. Remember, value is a high-quality two-way street. So make sure the connection is interactive. This is how you give value to another person’s life, even if you don’t ever talk again.
Make offers. Make an offer to stay engaged.
Ask others that seem friendly if they want to stay connected over video, coffee, tea, or brunch. Find a way to keep the connection going. If you find out they have something big approaching, follow up and ask how it went.
For example, a friend of mine I met at a luxury retreat loves the New Orleans Saints. Although I’m a Minnesota Vikings fan, I will text her asking “Who you got for the Saints game today?!” You might happen to see that you are both attending an upcoming event. Make it a point to visit with them.
Yes, make offers but don’t overburden them. Sometimes even a simple smile and “hello” are enough offering. If you have a friendship match, they will reciprocate.
Journal prompts
What are three new places you can visit in the next 3 months to interact with new people?
Instead of saying “fine” when asked how you are doing - what is a signature introduction you can have? Create one and go test it out with strangers.
Try these. If you want to become a socialite and/or grow your social wealth, let’s be sure to connect. You can go to my www.leadinglavishly.com/consultation to set up a consultation or a Q/A.